Will says: i don't wanna sound too deep or anythin ..Will says: but i wana change so badly ..
Tim says: what kind of change?
Will says: remember you in europe? that kinda change
Tim says: heck yea man
Tim says: ive been wanting something like that too
Will says: it kinda sounds gay but i've been doing alot of soul searching
Tim says: heck no man
Tim says: penis searching is gay
Tim: soul searching is great
*will leaves conversation*
I feel i've gone through some of the worst parts already, and from here... i'm thinking things can only get better. I've rewritten countless posts time and time again to express what the last few months have done to me, but it hurt too much.
and though things have gotten somewhat better, thinking about days gone past ... kill.
So i thought i'd write down a list of some things I'v thought about during this time of soul searching,
some deep and some not so deep:
- most things in life aren't as secure as we thought they'd be
- it doesn't always pan out the way we want it to
- and we waste a heck of a lot of time wishing it did
- self-hate, self-loathing, self-pity kill hope fast
- the first step to dealing with great loss is to accept what's done is done
- the first step to healing is often forgiving
- the person we often have to learn to forgive is ourselves
- a mans mind can be his portable murderer
- bitterness is not an event, its a process
- trials not only reveal ones character, but ones friends
- true friends,are hard to find
- and even once true friends prove themselves to be only once true friends
- i'd like to believe that i still have true friends
- help and genuine encouragement can come from absolute strangers
- courage is not necessarily being brave when facing big things, but making a decision
to face small minute things til something is achieved
- dreams dont always have to die
- failing doesn't make you a failure - giving up does
- running away is the coward's answer to everything
- looking back too long on the past may do more than just hurt us
- we are not promised anything
- holding back the tears just means theres more to come out later
- smiling when every particle inside you says break down equates to courage
- it could also equate to masking oneself
- silence can seem so loud when wasting time
- the best days so far have been spent with Him, and only Him
- i'd still like to believe that greater things have yet to come
-
(to be cont.)
